The Christmas we didn't buy a house...

It was September 2014, and we had put an offer on a short sale that we really wanted.

Knowing short sales can be anything but predictable, we decided to take a bit of a risk. We listed our current home before we knew whether our offer would ultimately be approved.

By October, our house was under contract with a November closing date.

And then we got the news.

The short sale wasn’t approved.

We knew it was a possibility, but suddenly it was very real: our house was sold…and we didn’t have another one to move into.

We could have backed away from the whole idea of moving. Instead, we reminded ourselves why we’d wanted to move in the first place.

Our home had served us well for years, but the kitchen was small and closed off from the rest of the house. Whoever was cooking often felt separated from everything happening in the other room. (Although, you’d be surprised how many butts we managed to fit into that tiny kitchen. )

What I really wanted wasn’t simply a different house.

I wanted a home where being together was easier.

So, while moving into a rental certainly hadn’t been part of the grand plan, we found one with an open floor plan, a big eating bar, vaulted ceilings and huge picture windows overlooking the backyard.

We moved too late to host Thanksgiving that year, but by Christmas, I remember being ridiculously excited that we could finally get a tall Christmas tree because of those vaulted ceilings.

And then came Christmas dinner.

We have a pretty good-sized extended family, and I can still picture that house buzzing. Some people were sitting at the big kitchen bar having wine. The boys were in the living room laughing with Auntie Susan. Others were gathered around the dining table eating hors d’oeuvres while dinner was coming together.

And I was in the kitchen, pulling a pan of roasted beets out of the oven—the last thing we were waiting for before everyone could dish up. (For the record, I hate beets. lol. But apparently everyone else thought they were delish.)

I set them down on that big eating bar with the rest of the food and realized something:

I was in the middle of it all.

The conversations. The laughter. The hustle and bustle of Christmas dinner.

I wasn’t tucked away in a separate kitchen listening to everyone else have fun.

I was part of it.

And for what felt like the first time, I got to enjoy the very thing I had been trying so hard to create for everyone else.

That’s why I remember that Christmas so clearly.

Not because we had landed in the house we’d originally wanted.

We hadn’t.

But because that rental gave us exactly what we’d been craving: a place where being together was easier.

And it taught me something I’ve carried with me ever since.

Sometimes we get so focused on what a move is going to require—the packing, the inconvenience, the temporary solution, the extra steps—that we lose sight of why we wanted something different in the first place.

That rental wasn’t our destination. It was a really wonderful placeholder.

Even better, living there helped me understand what mattered to me in our next home. I got to experience the things I thought I wanted instead of simply imagining them.

And waiting turned out to be worth it.

The following year, we resubmitted our offer on that short sale.

This time, it was accepted.

So why am I telling you all of this 99 days before Christmas?

Because maybe you’ve been thinking about making a change too.

Not necessarily because you need a bigger house or a prettier kitchen—but because there’s something about the way you want to live that your current home isn’t quite supporting anymore.

If that’s you, don’t start with, “Should I sell my house?”

Start with a different question:

“What do I want my home to make possible in my life?”

You might be surprised where the answer leads.

And if you ever want someone to help you think that through—without trying to sell you anything—you know where to find me. 

Christina

Guiding life’s transitions with intention, compassion, and trust.


*Image by fietzfotos from Pixabay